50K For Awareness Kick Off!

So today is the kick off of 50K for Awareness, so this is my first post! There that was 15 words already, oh there is some more lol. Anyway, I am jst going to jump right in and talk about random stuff, some may be poetry, haven't decided yet, we shall see. So I just want to say I have some awesome friends, thanks guy, theses past few days, well more like months have sucked, but I have you guys, so that makes it much more bearable, HUGS to all you Awesome people out there, love ya guys! I really can't thank you enough! We have shared laughs, tears, smiles, pain etc. All the days I have been alone, I haven't been totally alone because of you guys! My Birthday didn't suck, thanks to you guys and I am getting through this rough time thanks to you guys' help! I am taking a big step next week, thanks partly to my friends encouragement and myself wanting to do so.I just needed a little push, like when you are a kid on the swingset and you can't get high enough so you need a little push or when your friend is yelling at you to jump off, but you are scared, that is a better anology lol, I wonder if lol counts as a word, huh. I have been writing a lot of poetry recently, but I don't share it too much, if it wasn't for the fact anyone could see the blog I would put some up right now, but I have to decide if I want the whole world to have access to it or not before I would do that. Probably not though. I had went like 2 years without writing any poetry and the all the suden like a month ago or so I justed started writing in the middle of a post on facebook and now my ability to write it  is back it seems. Halloween was good last night, I handed out candy sitting outside in the freezing cold for like 2 hours, my nephew who lives with me gave me a bunch of candy the police station gave him, he got a bunch of special stuff because he lways goes and visists the staff there cause my dad worked mantinence there and is now Animal Control which is affilated with the police station, but anyway I made out pretty well! I passed out tho from eating chocolate, pots and chocolate doesn't mix for me. I did it again today and passed out again, so trying not to do it again lol. I don't like the fact Halloween has to be a holiday associated with evil, I am religious, so it bothers me, I wish we could make a new one where it was under God's name and called it something different and was done during the day. I made a purple ducktape bag the other day, it came out pretty cool, I will have to take pictures of it, but I want to get more ducktape if someone would get me some, so I could make stuff like wallets, other bags and tc., I wonder if etc. is a word, anyway, so yeah I would love to make more ducktape stuff, I hope everyone is doing welll, that is all I am going to say until tomorrow, if anyone else is doing 50K For Awareness GOOD LUCK TO YOU ALL! HUGE PURPLE STRIPEY ZEBRA HUGS, Yeah I know that lat part made no sense, but all well, love ya guys!

I am an Astronaut!

A lot of kids dream of being an astronaut, now that I know I am an astronaut, I don't think kids should dream to be one. I was listening to a song ealier that explains it all, no one would want to be an astronaut if they thought it would feel like what this song explains. Ir is all metaphorically speaking of course, lol, no I am not crazy, anyway, I will post the song here for yuou, listen for yourself, this is my favorite band I havebeen listening to for 6 or 7 years now!

Update

Sorry haven't been on much, most recently, I had a pretty good birthday thanks to my online potsie and eds buddies who talked to me and sent me gifts on my bday and one of those gifts was a bp machine amongst other things including a beautiful Bible which I love, some little notebbooks a ouple llittle  craft kits, two life and God books ad earplugs and othe things I love it all.. I am too tired to list everything I got, but I also got floewers fom one, a box of like kid bday stuff that made me laugh and I playe dwith it, I am still a kid in some wasy ol, a box of food way befoee my bday and a card for my early bday presentm a few other cards, a box with art stuff and a bear, a new keyboad haven't disovered how to install yet lol. Okay ataully that is pretty muh everything haha  I am so thankful to all you guys that sent me stuff, love ya all HUGS. I have finally started home Ocupational and Physical therapy. I have a very nice physial therapist and an awesome Ocupational therapist, I say awesome ot beause she has said she would help me find a way to get out of the house, like get housing, disability, food staqmps and medial equipment and also said she woulsd help retrain my body to do Ativities of sdiaily living again and een be able to cook whih I never have been able to.  Also I have been getting my cnas and nurses. I like my na too, she is nice. That is the good news. The bad news is, mydoctor is dropping me, because his dad got in a fight with my Mom so to punish her he is making his son rop me, whih apparently is allowed beausethe fathe oholds the voting rights of the pratie and the son who is my doc said he didn't want to drop me. I will now have to find a new do, but no other do I ould find in the state would take someone with my conditions and on my meds, especailly one of my meds and I am not supposed to go off that one and may be on it the rest of my life.  Also my beautiful freind Alexa passed away, so I am mouning he loss, but going to try and honor he by fighting fo  people with EDS and POtTS etc. RIP ALEXA! She is an amazing Angel now, she an fly free! Throughout all this it has been rough and more going on, but this is some of the moe recent main stuff. I am staying strong and just getting through, hoping soon I an do more then just survibve, but I am glad to be alive desite  all of this, some people say they want God to just take them from it al and I don't right now I want to live and see God when I am done livving my life and right now I am not even close! I will hoepfully tell you guys moe soon! LOVE AND HUGS TO YOU ALL!

My First Video Ever!

I finaly figured out how to make a video, I relized that you could use the webcam to make videos, I am so happy! YAY

All In All, A Good Night!

Hey guys, I had a pretty rough ay, followed by a petty good night. Tonight I had my fist video call on facebook and first time ever using a webcam.  My video call was with my newestpal Hannah and hope to have more video calls with her an other pals, so if you want to ave a video call with me let me know. I have skype as well, I may be able to figure it out the rest of the way and be able to udse it, so if you have skype we can talk on there Before y video call I was a little dow so I wrote this poem:

Do you ever feel alone in a crowded room?,
Do you ever feel a sense of impending doom?,
Do you ever feel like you are going to die?,
Do you ever fel like all you can do is cry?,

Cause I Do!

Do you ever want to give up?,
Do you hate it when no one says, ( "Hey what's up?")?,
Do you ever feel like you don't belong?,
Do you ever feel like you can't come along?,

Cause I Do!

Do you ever feel lke breaking down?,
Do you ever feel like you are about to drown?,
Do you eve feel out of place?,
Doyou ever feel like a huge disgrace?,

Cause I Do!,
Oh, Yes I Do!

So how about you?,
Well Do You?
I know it is a little depressing, but sometimes it is good to get those feelings out Anyway, after my video call I wa very happy and feeling a little bit better emotionally, which is always nice. A weid thing happened tho, right befoe the video call I got an adrenaine rush and potsie and felt nervous and as soon as I got into the call it went away It mus have either been a fluke or because I haven't been talking to people out loud, never mind face to face, so if we do video chat and I seem nervous bare with me! I was kinda embarrassed about my appearance during the video call too, so please don't mind that either if we are chatting. I also had a few great chats just on regular facebook chat with other potsie/eds fiends, so thanks to all  of you! Last night and into the early morning this morning I learnt a lot about myself through one particular person I was chatting with.  So that is good and I have been thinking a lot about that, I wish I was more comfortable to elaborate, it mostly has to do with stuff from my childhood and teen years, although technically I am still a teen, I am considered legally an adult, but anyway, I love all you guys so much and I pray for us all every night, which brings me to a request I have, a few of my friends have had it really rough and would like you to either pray for them or send them good thoughts/vibes and spoons or all three, their names are Milly, Nichole and Alexa, I usually wouldn't mention names, but since I control who knows  about my blog, I feel it is safe and okay to do so, I hope no  one minds if you do let me know and soy if it bothered you I will sop, I just really want to get prayers for my pals who need them! Okay Love and Hugs! Night!

Invisible Awarness

So  I  was too late doing this to give it to my friend to ost on the project she did for awareness, but I a going to do it now.

My name is Tonya, I am almost 19 years old, I have been sick since birth, I have EDS, POTS, Von Willebrands Disease, Acid Reflux, Reflex Symphatic Dystrophy, RLS, urinary and kidney touble, malnuritionment, vitamin deficiency, possible MCAD, Raynauds and Chiari, all being investigated as of right now. I suffer fom a variety of symptoms too long to list! I am bedidden as of right now and us a walker to get to the bathoom and to the kitchen. These diseases have cost me many things in life including my family and friends who just don't nderstand. However through Facebook Forums I have gotten myself new friends and the ones closest to my heart I consider family!I thank God for all of you guys, you are what gets me through each and eveyday and I can't possily expess how much I love you! I am glad God has given me the oortunity to meet you guys online and hoe one day to meet you in person! My goals i life are to make it back to college and become a doctor eventually, eigt now it seems impossible, but I am still holding out hope! I also want to meet an understanding guy who appreciates me for who I am and teats me well! I hoe to marysomeday and adopt children, I am  unfotunately most likely not able to have chldren of my own ut that's okay, there are plenty of children out there who need and deserve a loving home! As of right now I am trying to gain my independenc and live a good life!

My first real post!

So I am going to try and start off each post with a rose and a thorn, (a good and a bad thing that happened to me that day). So today's rose is that I met a great friend, I hope you know who you are if you are reading this. We have a lot in common and she is amazing and is helping me try and get through my thorn. My thorn is that, I must find a new place to live, long story. My parents think I am lazy and don't realize how my illnesses cause me to be sick and bedridden. So I need to find a place fast, I was sitting here debating whether I should write about this or not and said you no what the heck with it I am going to. Anyways, I don't like to be negative so I figured maybe by posting about my bad situation and adding something good that happened will be better.  Lately I have been struggling to swallow and eat in general and today and yesterday were two of the wost days for that this week. I am currently on many medications, but they don't always see to help me, some days it sees like none of them do anything and others it seems they do miracles so I don't know. I am thinking I should try and pack some stuff, but don't know where I am going so I am not too eager to pack. I am in a crappy place right now and if it wasn't for my fellow edsers and potsies and my music,which my ipod disappeared while I was at the hospital so I have had to use YouTube, but anyways without you guys and music I don't know what I would do! I love you all so much! I am going to be ding the 50,0000 words for awareness project when it starts this November, I will have to post the link to that up later and I am also doing a project for my friend where you send her a picture and a description of you and your illness and she is making a big project with all of them,I am not sure how many she has, but I can't Wait to see the finished product! I am hoping to figure out more about this blog stuff, cause I am still kinda confused by it, but hey I am learning, it was a big step for me to even make one! I hope this post finds you all well! LOVE and HUGS! GOD BLESS YOU ALL!

Women and Disabilities project from college Gender and Society Class

Intro- “women constitute 75 percent of the disabled population in low and middle-income countries due to gender discrimination in the allocation of resources and access to services.”
General issues that disabled women face- Statistical Surveys conducted by the disability movement found that disabled women have poorer health than the general population because they have less access to good health care than men because they face more discrimination due to being women and disabled. Disabled females are also among the poorest people.
Females with disabilities are two times as likely to be in unpaid employment than men are.

Women with disabilities face many issues of mobility, and very little support services that will help women with disabilities.
“Where disadvantage seems to escalate with disability and gender, access to help and assistance decreases.”
Disabled women are seen as not being sexual or desirable.
Abuse issues-
　
Disabled women face just as much abuse as women who aren’t disabled. Their need for help form others heightens this abuse. They are also stigmatized and socially isolated adding to their problems.
“MYTHThe disabled are 'unattractive' and therefore not subject to sexual assault.”
“REALITYRape is an act of violence not motivated by sexual attraction. In fact, the disabled may be subjected to assault precisely because they are seen by attackers as particularly vulnerable.”
“MYTHThe disabled are asexual and, if assaulted, will react very differently from other people.
“REALITYWomen with disabilities are not asexual. The reactions of a disabled woman will be similar to those of any other woman, although the trauma of being overpowered may sometimes be greater. In any case, in any sexual assault, degradation, humiliation, and power are the issues ... not just lust or passion.”
“MYTH“Women with disabilities are raped and abused at a rate at least twice that of the general population of women.25”“Among developmentally disabled adults, as many as 83% of the females’“Disabled women have a rate of 85% of them as victims of domestic violence. ^xvi ‘　
Accessibility Issues-
In the United States, over 12% of Americans report experiencing disabilities. More than 50% are women. Women with disabilities often do not receive necessary health care because of:
lack of transportation and support services,
inability to locate accessible exam tables,
lack of reproductive health care,
some physician’s lack of awareness and knowledge about disabilities, other accessibility issues.
“ No one has to walk to be a typist, but if a company is housed in a building that is inaccessible to wheelchairs, and therefore refuses to hire a competent typist who uses a wheelchair because it would be expensive to fix the building, has it discriminated against her on the basis of her disability? Laws may say yes, but people will resist the laws unless they can see that the typist’s inability to work in that office is not solely a characteristic of her as an individual.”

Women with disabilities represent a disproportionably high percentage of the unemployed within the disability community. The disability movement has conducted several statistical surveys and found that women with disabilities are among the poorest people in society. Women with disabilities also have poorer health in comparison to all other groups in the society. This is because women generally have less access to good quality health care than men in general do, but is compounded by the fact that women with disabilities face additional discrimination on the grounds of their disabilities.
Connection to the class-
It connects to the class because disabled women are even more oppressed than able bodied women. They suffer many of the same things we have talked about in class and these things that happen to disabled women, detailed in the presentation.

　
　
　
Sources-

www.Ilga.org
www.disabilitynet.net
www.capegateway.gov
www.secasa.comThe disabled woman who is raped, especially if blind, deaf, or emotionally disabled, is probably not capable of effectively cooperating in efforts to apprehend or prosecute her assailant.”
“REALITYOn the contrary, women with disabilities have effectively cooperated in prosecuting assailants, using their unimpaired abilities.”www.awid.orgwww.ncdsv.org
www.opcc.netwww.ksl.com
Women’s voices Feminist Visions - Social Construction of Disability, pg. 117.

Welcome to my blog!

Hey everyone if you were invited to be a member of my blog that means you are special to me and I trust you! I will be posting some stuff soon, I think the first thing will be an essay I wrote in high school, it is really long, but you could read just parts of it, or none of it, if you want lol.